It's taken me 50,000 separate wrecks to get here and
I've learned absolutely nothing. As I'm standing here alone,
upright and motionless, I'm drowning in her sea.
The rising and sinking of every consciousness I've ever known
now detached and disconnected. The endless cycle of idea and action,
endless invention, endless experiment, endless hopes and endless
disappointments. And I thought all I needed was just one breath to stay
afloat. For me it was like... like the breath, the last breath, the last breath
that I never wanted. Any of this.

I’m moving forward.
I never thought that this would
capsize, but this isn't a boat, it's a coffin! And now I'm moving forward.

Into the sea... into the great sea.
So I began with the end in mind.
The cycles of heaven, 20 centuries gone by, come home.

I've fallen three miles now... and still I can't shake this dragon,
but the end is coming like a flood. This is going to be a year for
growing and the greatest amount of forgetting. My sea is drying, but
death is a doorway,
and at the very root of me I know this.
It's the greatest reminder. What a broad world to roam in,
what a sea to swim in, so I begin with the end in mind.


(c) Norma Jean